The Clark Family

The Clark Family

Monday, October 18, 2010

Reflecting







The last few days I have been thinking about the way our lives have been blessed and how much God has given us this year, the two children he has added to our home and the love and joy they have brought, healing Crimsyn after bringing him home just in time. Wow we have had an amazing year, with many ups and downs, laughter and tears. God has taught us so much through our children all of them, but in most recent times through Crimsyn and Resiana. I never really understood the exact meaning of trusting the Lord and I know it can be said for many things "we need to trust the Lord" but through this experience I think I found out a little of what trusting the Lord was about. I remember a few days before we got the call to come back and get our baby, I was so distraught and felt part of myself was questioning everything why why why???
I did not want to be that way but I was struggling knowing what precious little Crimsyns life would be like. One day I was praying and I told the Lord he was worthy of the praise no matter what and that I would do my best to be the best even though I did not understand and I think I realized it was not for me to understand at the time, no my hurt did not go away not even in the least but he spoke peace to my soul, in a way only he could, the comforting hand of our dear Saviour...Today I am so thankful he has lifted that burden and brought so much joy to us with the GIFT of baby Crimsyn, for I know he belongs to God and we have been allowed to love and cherish him. The love I have for my childrens birth family is so great, to be given the chance to love and be loved by my children is my dream come true and the joy our children brings is the most fullfilling experience I have ever had, being a Mother is simply amazing, and I thank God daily, I have alot to learn and I need wisdom but the challenges that come along with motherhood cannot even be compared to the joys of motherhood.

As you all know Crimsyn fell very ill shortly after he came to be with us , as we were in the hospital with him it hit us of how God brought him home to us just in time, in time for him to get medical help and to have such precious people praying for him, while we were in the hospital the Lord sent him so much help, help that could of only came from him, in ways that no amount of medicine could of done..He truly is a miracle...

Our children our the happiest little kids in the world, Caden came in the living room one day while I was holding Crimsyn and said "Mama we dont have to cry anymore" they love him so much all of them but his big brother Carter is soo crazy about him and loves tending to him, he will sit forever and hold him if we let him, the little ones love him to but would rather be playing with each other, they are still best buds ( I could count on my one hand in the past six months how many times they have argued) they love each other so much and want to be together all the time, its precious.

Resiana is doing so good in school, her teacher said she is a social butterfly and everyone wants to be her friend. She still is the most grateful child you have ever seen, she will recount things that happened in the "park" from time to time and it is simply gut wrenching, I dont think she realizes how disturbing it really is, that was just her life for nearly five years. She is so normal though as if she has always been here and been our child, she is just our little girl..We are thankful beyond measure!!!

2 comments:

  1. Thanks for the happy tears this morning. :-) Trusting Him - even in the dark. It's pretty easy when you can see the way. . .He showed me one time a blind man who depended on his guide dog. In the middle of New York City, a blind man maneuvered his way through the crowds, across the streets of crazy traffic - all because he followed the nudges of the guide dog. Just nudges! The dog didn't drag him, he gently gave him the nudges and the blind man heeded them. Why? Because the blind man had learned to trust the guide dog - he knew he would keep him safe. What a huge lesson for me. God has proven He'll keep me safe. If I can be calm and pay attention to the nudges, instead of starting out "blindly" running here and there. . .well, let's just say He gave me a valuable lesson. How precious that He loves us and teaches us all! There is NO peace that compares with trusting Him - wherever we are, whatever situation we are in - blessed be the name of the Lord. :-)

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